Early in my coaching experience, when I was being coached, I was put through an exercise to identify my core values. This wasn’t a long, drawn-out experience to think about. This was a quick, “you are standing alone with no outside influence—what values are so important that you must have them no matter where you are or what you do”. My first response was “Freedom & Adventure!”.
This might make some people look at my sideways and think, “woman, you are a middle-aged Mom in the suburbs. What kind of freedom and adventure are you living?”. If you only knew.
I can remember being 4 years old and demanding my way. Frequently. It didn’t make sense to me to do anything that wasn’t my idea, or my choice. (For those of you with strong-headed women in your life, this might look familiar to you ). As the 7th of 9 kids in the family, it’s a wonder that my parents didn’t put me out to pasture. I’m sure that would have been easier on Mom and the family, but I persisted.
Freedom and adventure didn’t make me reckless. It made me excited. It made me try out things that seemed interesting and were a little out of my comfort zone. It made me seek new ideas, new places, new challenges. Freedom and adventure taught me how capable I am. It opened my eyes to larger ideas. It made me say things like, “how would l…”, instead of “I can’t because of …”. Freedom and adventure make me open my heart to the Universe and listen for messages.
So, before you set out to lose 25 pounds, or start an exercise routine, ask yourself, “what are my core values?”. List about 5-7 and go from there. This sets a framework for how you go about losing 25 pounds. When clients come to me to lose weight and tell me their primary core value is “family”, I ask if they are living in alignment with this. I ask if their relationship with food supports them in a way that they would want their young children or grandchildren to emulate. This opens their eyes. That is how you approach healthy living and a core value.
Telling people what their core values should be, or what their motivation for change should be never works. It has to come from within. Each person has a value system and makes decisions in life that support or detach from these.
Ask yourself, what are some of your top values, and how does your life align with these?
If you are interested in more exercises to uncover your motivation for change, please reach out for a conversation. You may discover a whole new aspect of yourself you’ve been looking for.
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